I heard Topanga got a DUI. I need that mugshot asap.
I mean, he's dancing back and forth between pathetically sad and massively fucking creepy.
I hate thxgiving break now because that totally means I'm not able to have sex for a week.
I can't, I'm busy. I've been walking around Tokyo on google maps for an hour.
I was hitting on her while she was puking ... yeah i was pretty drunk
There're making snowcones with the leftover vodka from last night. This is not the time to be making up excuses!
I can already see the regret in her eyes. Amazing night. This city rules.
gona look into getting a tetanus booster and carrying an adrenaline shot...its going off this weekend
She has the perfect pussy. Looks like a paper cut with a puff of cotton candy on top.
I feel like vibrating beds are just synonymous with venereal diseases.
I am going to tweet NASA until they put me into space
Those rocketship riding assholes need the common man
I have suspicion of morning wood.
How are you unsure as to the current state of your penis?
In order to save time, dignity and liver damage, wanna get naked?
The guy got mobbed on, all hell broke loose. About 20 cops showed up, and this kid somehow convinced a cop that letting him pee in front of him is justifiable. This guy could sweet talk Hellen Keller, he was THAT good
Lol, perhaps. But the drinks are so cheap, the music is better, and the bartenders and bouncers all know my name. I can't abandon it, even if it is a gay bar, its still my Nirvana.
Randomize
