omg a stripper jus od'd on stage.
I wish i could call my weed and hear it ring. That's how i found my phone.
if that blanket by the dog bowl was your dog's "bed" then i apologize to bailey for having sex on it
On the back of that comment, I've formed a theory that as a result of my brainwashing your drunk self actually believes that beards are your calling.
In honor of the internet blackout, I think everyone needs to change their Facebook pictures to ones of them being blacked out.
Its official vodka lemonade jager and whiskey with coorslight is a bad combination of try to forget the work week cocktail ps bring alkaseltzer
Like theyre better than no shoes. I'm sitting her balls naked playing xbox in nothing but crocs with the fur
There's a baby duck in my toilet. Fuck you.
Just wanted to say, I appreciate your bravery in having read receipts
Getting drunk in an Applebee's pray for me
Lord god protect this child
About 98% sure I just walked by some dude jerking it in the library. I'm guessing his college experience isn't going as planned
I'm literally beginning to think that my sex dreams are prophesies
Currently tripping balls and watching Pink Floyd the wall and I'm crying during it. If this isn't a self realization then I don't know what to tell you.
Your youporn search history says otherwise.
Well, not only did I find out the Top Knight has roof access, I also let a guy I just met eat me out on the roof. Seems like a lot of wins if you ask me.
Randomize
