I just got back to Nicks and I shoul dnot have drank this much when I have to work at 7AM!!!!!
He tried. I said no. He said, "It's ok if I do this?" and proceeded to jerk himself off. Oh, the French.
Do you ever just think "I could really go for a good 30 minute blowjob". I do. Everytime jill smiles.
He blow dried my hair while I sucked his dick. Now THAT'S fucking teamwork.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If you try to operate on me with a Bic pen and vodka, I'm never talking to you again
Come down here. We are watching people walk through the paper we taped in front of the elevator.
Apparently I tried to convince him to sleep with me by showing him that I could do dips....
Yes I hit her with my car. Yes I gave her a ride home. And yes she gave me her number. What's the problem?
It took all the strength I had tto sit at my desk and not tear off my business attire and run screaming from adulthood and flourescent lights.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just tell your mom you have to go somewhere half naked with a strange man. She'll understand
Thank you contacting dial-a-boner. Currently, our boner is on a run to service another client. You can either wait 2 hours for service, or share concurrent service with the current client.
I'm drunk still and I cried and now I'm watching Whitney Houston singing the national anthem and I'm crying more
All I know is I woke up cuddling a jar of peanut butter....
My mother is currently smoking weed with a dying bee so his last moments aren't miserable. And she wonders why I rescued a grasshopper missing a leg.
how do do this?
do what? Keep standing? Choose between 2 guys?
keep making boys cry?
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