At least you're going to bed with all the teeth you woke up with
i just threw up repeatedly on the entire entire walk down A1A to the pizza place....then on the way back slipped and fell in it
Woke up. Made a pizza. Burnt it. Going back to bed cuz today sucks
Should I feel bad that I fucked her and made her ride my little brothers razor scooter home?
I was wondering if I fell or perhaps got hit by a truck, then I remembered, it's cause I did a splits contest at the bar
we got cut off at 8 am. He spilled his drink three times on the plane. this should be one hell of a vegas trip
I dunno. The only plans I have for sure after finals are smoking a bowl and eating a 5 pound gummy bear. btw I bought a 5 pound gummy bear
Not sure I just ate a really big pot brownie, I feel like my future is uncertain
For only eating leftover pizza for breakfast today, you sure do have a lot to vomit up...
I woke up on the dog bed, bottle of alcohol still in hand and my thong was hanging off the family portrait.... Yikes
She just rubbed her face up and down my six pack cooing. Equal measure of weird and hot.
I might be the strongest willed bouncer ever. Earlier tonight a girl flashed me trying to get in. I just replied "Sorry I'm gay", she believed me and left.
What's dad's email?
askmom@cause.idk
so I may or may not have had intense sex to mozart's greatest hits on vinyl... I don't know if I should be proud or just really disappointed in my nerdness
I can't really text bc it's too expensive but I thought youd like to know I just shit myself in a gift shop.
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