I bought the tickets, he brought the weed. thanks to you, we had to roll a joint out of my bible paper.
Our cab driver just admitted to beating up kids in the 60's who didn't smoke pot...
throwing condoms aimed at his crotch probably isn't the politest way to ask for sex
If she doesnt understand your inherent need to teabag an emo chick, do you really want to be with her?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
a kid who worked there came up to me and let me know you were sitting in the bathroom sink. he said it was fine, so i just kept checking on you.
They'd unbutton the overalls with their lesbian-tongues. It wouldn't even be a problem.
I'm sorry I tried putting my balls in your cup holder.
And he was super vague about his life, it was frustrating. I totally boned a homeless guy, didn't I?
I think the main reason you were throwing up so much was the quart of soap you chugged trying to burp bubbles. you came close
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Don't upload the drink o meter to your google calendar. Somehow binge drinking looks even worse with a time stamp.
I JUST ATE A STRANGE BURRITO, I SHOULD NOT BE EXPECTED TO KNOW ANYTHING RIGHT NOW.
you were crying saying "if you love me you will find me a loaf of bread"
When / where did the additional couches appear?
Additional?
James brought one with him when he showed up. Theres still 2 outside and according to facebook, at least one more burned up.
he bit THROUGH my nipple
plus side, no need to pay for a piercing.
so i realized that he's only my physical relationship and beer is my emotional relationship...
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