we're at the bar and some girl dropped a bottle of burnettes strawberry vodka out of her purse and it broke.
i mean, if that's not class, then i don't know what is
I'll hook up with guys I don't even like, as long as they leave early enough the next day.
They should make Jack Daniels chap stick
There's a group of australian girls next to me. can't take them seriously. think they are going to turn into mr g
what is the most politically correct way to ask if he still hangs out with the guy that has blue hair and make meth in his car?
Dude she was 62...with a boob job. And I'm proud to say I made out with that.
Whatever. I indirectly made you cum overseas. Call it even.
Just walk straight and zig zag through cars tell you get to the road. That's where I am. Perpendicular to the doors do not make any turns
I owe you cheese. The drunk munchies don't acknowledge food ownership.
But yesterday I literally met half his family buzzed wearing a cheeta print bathing suit super short shorts and a tiny tank top.. I was like awesome
I was about to take him home and fuck his brains out but then the police came and arrested him for the stolen credit card he had been buying me drinks with all night...
There is a man playing a trumpet at this brunch and I hate life. Too hungover for this. Send help ASAP.
I've entered the world of uncircumcised penises. It's disgusting.
So I just watched a seagul attack my boss and steal his food in the parking lot. Today might not be a bad day lmfao.
This is not okay. I only like one boy. I should like 200 boys and be having wild unprecedented sex. Instead I like one boy whose a born again virgin.
Randomize
