Note left in log book: "4:30am a guy was caught masturbating in the bathroom and passed out in his own juices and we had to take the door off the hinges."
You guys are open that late?
This girls a $30 bar tab from being bi
Exactly how deep of a burn should you have when you pee before becoming legitimately concerned?
I learned to sign I want to be on you today
Score
Deaf chicks here I come
Not sure. No solid plans. Just tanning nude.
you told that cab driver that when the 3 of us come togehter it means happiness and love
Nobody in the ambulance liked me...
He just told me what he wants for his birthday. "a noise complaint" he also said he wants to be the cause of all the noise but he won't be the one making the noise.
Just had the best random sex ever with a girl I picked up from a pro choice rally uptown. God bless the Democratic National Convention.
As long as I don't spend the half the week passed out/fucked up on Klonopin and no one dies, this will be the best week I've had all semester.
Hey, I'm making progress. I haven't thrown up in a bar while wearing a sweater vest in almost two months.
Woke up, moved an empty handle of fireball to spit blood, then put the morning cigarette out in it.
Hey what you doing tonight?
Working at the hospital! So hurt yourself and come visit :)
See you in about a hour
I know it sounds cheesy, but i think both me and her mum know they are "thanks for being so cool about finding nudes of your daughter on the camera" flowers
I don't like kids.
You were literally holding a baby 5 minutes ago
I like them before they learn to speak and after they learn to think.
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