how did your night go?
he asked for my myspace name.
woke up to find a pram in the balcony. first thing we did was look over the edge!
I don't hate you. My dick is upset with you, but I don't hate you.
I wont be hard to find. Im wearing a darth vader mask and I have a megaphone.
omg theres cum all over the american flag and now its up in front of his house.
I wish that one Sunday morning I could wake up feeling like I have my life together.
Every time I remember you're bi, the world gets a little brighter.
you cried when she wouldn't let you have her bathroom rug.
stuck in the elevator with that hot guy from the 3rd flood. Worried he can smell my spray tan and desperation
Taco Bell. She just parked, got out of the car mid drive-thru, ran to the dumpsters, pissed, then ran back and drove up in the line.
Every time you visit for the weekend I end up having to bleach my entire house after.
My mom just added me on Facebook... She has one like and it's Will Smith
Just reintroduced tequila back into my life...so that's happening
YAS SHES BACK AND BETTER THAN EVER
I definitely fucked a Trump supporter last night but I wouldn't let him fully admit it because then I would've had to leave and his cock and abs were too perfect
He was my first marine! I wanna remember his name!
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