More tranny stories later!
I'm just sayin u wanted to sleep after ur paper. I can make u sleep
Don't tits with veins remind you of road maps?
you rearended a car with your bike and then puked all over his back windshield. They made BUI's for you.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Sundays have taken on a whole new meaning when I'm not in bed with an excruciating hangover.
This is random, but did i give u a handjob in the middle of the night or was that a dream?
she left out the fact that she had a kid until she told me not to suck on her tits too hard or milk would come out.
I've made out with men from every corner of the globe. Sex-wise, I've almost conquered europe. Take that napoleon
I'm pregaming for my hair cut. Working two jobs definately taught me how to use my time wisely...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
What is she getting? Last time we talked her behavior was conducive to getting a tramp stamp on her face.
I tore the muscle in my left calf at the gym and still spent all evening in heels. UNSTOPPABLE!
What's the policy on calling guys who have kids daddy...
Unintionally got shitfaced at study group this week. The waitress brought out a fishbowl of long Island iced tea. Challenge accepted.
TELL HER ABOUT THE GODDAMNED MOTHERFUCKING POTATOES
I miss my bedroom and my bed and being able to spray myself with my choice of 15 different perfumes so I don't have to wake up to the smell of my past sins
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