My brain says no but my pants say off.
I went for the touchdown every play, and I think I ended up with herpes.
The best part was her genuine shock and total "I didn't know" look when we said she couldn't cook a steak in a microwave.
Well hello freshman 15, didn't see you there until I tried on last years summer clothes.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't really know I'm just giving her a key to get back in and the "don't get pregnant speech" and leaving it at that.
I Know I'm the drunk girl in the trunk right now, BUT PLEASE LISTEN TO ME!
Did you ever stop and think that god invented whiskey dick specifically for me
The rest of us are chipping in to soundproof your bedroom. This is getting ridiculous.
We bought a hamster while completely stoned and 2 hours later returned it because your mother wouldnt let you bring it in her house. You cried. a lot.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Denis dont give a fuck, Denis drinks out of straws. Denis disregards the fire station & bought 18 fire hoses so he can fight it himself if the farmhouse is on fire.
Drive by water balloon fight on $500,000 boats ended when someone threw a dildo
He hasn't touched a vagina in two and a half years. THIS IS WAY TOO MUCH PRESSURE TO BE UNDER
I woke up knowing I have nowhere to be today except parties and it was glorious and I am so happy
Dude, I'm thinking today is Single as Fuck Friday because that's how I'm feeling
I drank all the wines... and all th Doritos. Whilst watching Fat Camp. I need to reassess my values.
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