btw ... thanks for not giving me up as the craigslist killer
i owe you one
thanks for snagging those panties for me
Sometimes your consistent use of proper punctuation makes me nervous D:
I just woke up in the coolest sweatsuit i have ever seen..it has cory's name on the tag...do we know a cory?
Taljing aboutpenisrs w gerruly ska pops
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
an ex called crying about her current BF. convo ended in phone sex. i love emotional wrecks
And then he said "good night girls" and kissed each one before I put my shirt back on
I am currently eating pure cake frosting...I am not sure how I was ever referred to as a responsible adult.
I mean we've tried to get high on nutmeg, we clearly dont know the definition of "too far"
New justification for blow: drug week; 'how it's made'
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's titled "A countdown to death. A psychological look at the downward spiral of actress Lindsay Lohan and her inevitable Hollywood demise" This dissertation is genius. Not a single sober moment for either Lindsay or myself. Good stuff!
My pubic hair is shaved into the shape of mistletoe.
I hope that's a joke and if not I need a snap of it
Last night was just a whirlwind of Mario Brothers and sex.
Look, I've got a really big car. We just need to put ourselves in it and put some body parts in other body parts.
Still drunk. lying on the floor just rubbing my cats nipples
Stupid Covid-19
The universal cock block of this decade
Randomize