Your face is a jimmy john
I've decided to bang my pen-pal.
i found her turbo button.....if you know what i mean.
why would she cut her hair? she needs all the distractions possible from those texas-sized gums and horse teeth.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
sorry can't make it tonight, greg's getting back from italy. he's had two weeks of carbs and no gym; now's my chance to get myself a piece of that newly-fat, low self-esteemed ass.
But he does seem to be getting proper humping etiquette down. So there's progress.
Im invoking the "no judgements" clause of our friendship.
My god, what have you done?
Also, you should've bet on Team Liver.
We won.
USA USA USA
I'm suffering a hangover from deep within. I feel like the half of the parts of my body are permanently laced with alcoholic substances
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If I remember correctly I tried to steal a mail truck last night
Well I got black out drunk before the rehearsal dinner and berated my family with insults. But other then that it was a good time
How can you tell that you're blacked out ?
You can feel it in your nipples.
If he wants a future he'd best figure out the calendar function on his phone. If he can invite you to his penis he can invite you to his google cal.
I don’t have enough daddy issues for this shit, make him go away
Wtf did i hit my head on?
Tequila
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