he suggested we appoligize to eachother. then do blow and painkillers & have ourselves a make-up party.
I yelled "Coming in hot." before penetrating. Im pretty sure she loved it.
It wasn't a wasted relationship. I got road-head in an Escalade. I still keep that with me.
I don't know how but I have our hotel room door handle in my purse... this can not be good
Uh, also, Rob told me he felt bad for choking you.
I called him daddy. To his face. Somewhat sober. What more could I do?
Yeah.. he went to Tebow in the middle of the crosswalk and got hit by a cab... The yellow ones really don't stop
Apparently he's taking the slut he cheated on me with on a cruise for her birthday. THAT COULD HAVE BEEN ME. TITANTIC STYLE.
Remind me to tell you a really funny story about me and arson.
WHITE RUSSIAN BREAKFAST CEREAL.
Funny how I'm trusting a magic 8 ball I found in the kids toy section to tell me about my sex life
I went on a psycho cleaning spree so I feel I've earned the right to spend the day in bed watching porn and eating sausage biscuits. If you bring alcohol you can join me.
All other girlfriends are inferior. You are the chosen one.
He was nothing but deer-caught-in-headlight eyes and dick, it was adorable
His exact words: "I don't have anything you can't treat with antibiotics."
He showed up at my house with roses and a bottle of vodka... to watch a movie. obvi i took the vodka and didn't sleep with him
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