After 9 shots a girl with a mustache......still not attractive
she looked like she should be chained to micheal vicks radiator
just woke up to a 10 min voicemail of you singing "99 red ballons".... you need to work on your german..
everyone has their kryptonite. mine just happens to be 18 year old blonde girls.
There's a girl at 7-11 apologizing for her behavior and asking if she can get her shoes back.
His ankle bracelet only gets in the way when I'm trying to take off his pants.
her facebook pictures are like a timeline of all the guys she's screwed.
I swear this girl is like a Cross between Danny Devito and Anne Heche....the Lesbian Years.
Did you know you could bring s cooler of beer to the nail salon?
Half of elefante. Gelafin galaxy
The last thing I remember is teaching our waffle house waitress to do the stanky leg and promising the grill cook we would come see him at his other job.
I got picked up after "I just threw up in my face". Then I had very specific instructions involving the bathtub.
Instead of more alcohol, I decided to drink tea. Lets slow clap it out for me
Yup on the verge of buzzed and drunk. I managed to make my way into my cat's box house to fall asleep. I'm comfortable
Nothing says Happy Holidays like sending a picture of your ass to the wrong manager.
Randomize
