ok, im coming! i just found some lemon square in my bangs, washing that out..this shit is all over me! was i in a pie eating contest?
yes
did i win? did you like my outfit? or should i change, if you were horny would you bang me?
This is random, but did i give u a handjob in the middle of the night or was that a dream?
if you're passed out when i get there i get to wear your banana costume and do awful things to you
all I know is he gave me a Cialis and tried to take me home.
This conversation has now reached a level of awkward that even a passerby streaking hobo couldn't break.
Everyone heard you scream that I was to be naked, in your bed in 5 minutes. We were one hell of a shitshow spectacle
Just ushered a raccoon across the street so yeah.. Good night
You held an empty wine bottle to your head and declared yourself the "wine unicorn." For the rest of the night you galloped everywhere and whenever anyone refused to be a wine unicorn with you, you tried to spear them with the bottle.
we need to find a way to be drinking champagne 24/7
His name is Angel. I'm pretty sure he was sent from heaven solely to eat me out.
I kept on yelling at him to get his shit together as he was puking
This really high kid past out in the corner of the room holding a box of cheez its in his arm. My idol.
Well I'm sorry I assumed you were a human and that humans have the capability to forget sometimes.
I told him I wanted to get on him and ride him to Montana. It didnt end like i thought it would.
you asked if you could borrow my vagina for the night
Randomize
