If the pens lose tonight I'm gonna drive to Detroit and burn 8 mile to the ground.
Actually I may do that regardless. Probably get my own holiday.
Not only did a random toaster end up in my house last night, it's also full of skittles.
i have a "get your shit together" dinner with my parents tonight. After that ill be down to party
It's confirmed. We did xmas carol the grocery store across the street from his building at 2:30am... Only the staff was there.
He woke up licked his hand and put it on my vag and went back to sleep. This is twice this week and its only wednesday
Come outside. The vendor wants to go out strong tonight! Russian hooker interviews. Don't ask. We leave in 3 minutes.
We are not in the same countries and I heard about your hook up last night BEFORE you.
Gin and redbull in a wine glass. They think I'm keeping my wits with a really yellow Chardonnay. Gonna get ugly after a couple.
Those titties aren't worth a lifetime of listening to her talk about gluten free yams and japanese manga.
where are you guys? the police just woke me up on the couch outside.
Can you explain the plethora of sunflower seeds in the dryer?
So I definitely fucked a guy while holding on to his pigtails like reigns last night.
The most literal cowgirl position ever.
All his ex-girlfriends are delicate flowers, tho. And I'm like a trash compactor.
I wouldn't worry about it. You know what they say, THICK THIGHS MAKE THE DICK RISE.
We're listening to drake in the middle of the woods and smoking two joints at once...my life is complete.
Security showed up because apparently we were fucking too loud.
As your roommate I can attest that y'all do indeed fuck rather loudly
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