Got a toothbrush?
dont you remember the bouncer yelling at you while you were trying to piss?
no. why was the bouncer in the bathroom?
he wasn't. neither were you.
He thanked me for being "his little blond pogo stick last night". Good thing?
I just hit a new low..poured my beer in an empty coke can so I could drink in walmart.
Dude. My sister is off limits. Touch her again and I'll rip off your dick and force feed it to you.
I accept this challenge.
If tjhis were a lake full of vodka and i were a ducl Id swim my way down and ddrink my way up
Like. There is beer on the other side of that door and 6 yards in. If he's not back in 20 minutes to let me in, I am using this tree as a battering ram.
Sounds good. Stay safe. I'm kind of drunk in a Food 4 Less right now and I'm having the time of my life.
He showed up at my door at 3 AM wearing a Santa hat with a tiara attached.
i just came to a realization. Besides probably food, in my lifetime i think i have spent more money on legal fees than anything else
There are five fire trucks here and needless to say my booty call left so come back home whenever you like
Oh, and one of the worst parts... his name was Mario. I fucked a Nintendo character.
I got my nipples pierced. If you haven't seen my boobs in the past week, you're among the minority
I want your cock. I also want to cuddle you and tell you how amazing you are, because you know balance.
I feel really sorry for my toilet right now
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