I just realized i haven't had sex in 2009. oh man thats embarrassing.
He had on juicy sweatpants and thats when i knew he was no longer a threat.
I couldn't open my car door and for a second I thought they were taking me to an intervention circle.
Quite frankly, I consider the fact that I'm NOT pregnant one of my greatest achievements and I'd like to chronicle that ongoing success. I'm going to post pictures of me at "0 weeks" once a week.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
and then you seriously asked him to senior prom..which freaked him out since you told him earlier you were 22
can you blow me for old times sake
only for old times sake
The only thing I remember from last night is being naked in his bed if that's not summer drinking at it's finest then I don't wanna live anymore
I could not handle jail. And my very angry parents.
I just opened a pickle jar stoned as fuck. I clapped for myself. I feel like wonder woman.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's the 3rd day of the year and I've already sucked two dicks. New year same ole me.
I just realized I wasn't at the party anymore. I was just sitting there with a vacuum.
DO NOT TRY TO APPROACH HER CAT. IT IS A DEMON CAT FROM SATAN'S BALLS AND IT *WILL* TRY TO KILL YOU. I SPEAK FROM EXPIRENCE.
90% sure I just sold adderall to my professor
100% proud
Verdict: uncircumcised.
Like honey no, I’m getting groceries while pretending that having sexy talk with you is turning me on
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