awesome recipe for disaster- bar hopping at the airport
He gave me a book last time I slept there. Im beginning to feel like a really weird hooker. Like instead of money he gives me random shit he has lying around. like hamburger buns
i would one night stand the shit outta him
They ran through the sprinklers in front of campus police, shirtless. Singing "love is a battlefield"
ARE YOU GOING TO SACRIFICE YOUR LIFE FOR MCDONALDS HASHRBOWNS
That was an excessively violent trivia night
His best friend's cat died so we had a drunken burial ceremony on the side of his condo at 2am and I'm pretty sure if anyone gets ahold of the video feed from Martini Monday we're all fired.
Want to get drunk and look at an xray of my dick?
I started crying then my dog licked his dick so yeah.. Kind of ruined the moment.
No it was good. I serenaded the holding cell occupants with a fabulous rendition of Making Love out of Nothing at all. It was fucking amazing!
Ah. Hot spring. Infinitely less skeevy than a hot tub. These North Carolinian dudes are all class.
Bitch I slept on the ground 2 nights running
I just got the high sucked out of me. Fuck.
What are you talking about? Keg stands at wedding are super classy.
Is there a way to use porn to inspire him to have dirty thoughts? Like the movie Inception except with more lube and orgams?
Randomize
