it was a sick party until you insisted on putting on "that's how I beat shaq"
I just saw the nastiest chick.
Where?
woke up next to her... fuck you jack daniels, fuck you
On ecstasy, in Ikea. this is incredible.
I just watched her pee in a trashcan, im still probably going to fuck her, what does that say about my standards
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
don't let me wipe my vag with a dirty leaf outside of mcdonalds ever again.
I am VERY upset that you called my fiesta a waste of time.
I tried to say goodbye but you were hugging a trash can and I wasn't sure if you had clothes on
I should start an etsy shop with all the jewelry and clothes women leave at my house
I feel like a cloud. A cloud that wants to be laid.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Are we talking about who knows if I'll get naked pictures of you with a broadsword or who knows if I'll be surprised?
2 reasons we need to wear those onesies to the bar more ofter 1) comfy as shit 2) we both still got laid\n\nHow can you resist that kinda night?
as he was bent over the toilet, he turned to me and said "barbarian kyle is much stronger than regular kyle" and then went right back to puking.
Blacked in cold and wet, with them areound me singing Aaaaall we are saaaaayiiiing is YOU PEED YOUR PANTS
These morning walks of shame have became my morning jogs
And you tried to get me to have sex with you in our Harry potter closet lol
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