it's a shame restraining orders have to come between me and my relationships
As gay men are we obligated to learn the Single Ladies dance.
Is it bad that when I see babies I feel bad for them because its going to be forever until they are 21?
don't think this is any sort of attachment thing but if I'm going to throw up regularly at your house, I'm going to keep a tooth brush there
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Theres dried jager, barbecue sauce and frie remnants all over my front seat.
I guess at this point I should stop judging guys on their looks and more on their major and trust fund. Growing up sucks.
Swear to god, if I have to wingman for you on my honeymoon I'm gonna be pissed
Rachel and his cat watched us 69 last night. I pretended to be embarrassed the next day... But to be honest I like an audience
We just set the fire alarm off with a fog machine. What's my first instinct? Finish my drink. I think I handled that correctly.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm always drunk lately
Now I'm in a game of hide and seek in Sears
i fucking swear, saying shit like "i dont get jealous" is like personally inviting your slutty friend to fuck the guy you slept with like a month ago
i puked in the 2nd best shower and the couple fucking in the 1st didnt even pause so you might wanna hold off on that for a while
I can't adult today.
Take a nap and try again
I have to buy a couch. There's nothing more adult than buying a couch on a Tuesday.
I know he's only a bandaid for my emotional disrepair, but he can stick me anytime!!
The neighborhood cougar just purred at me while I was doing yard work. I’m terrified and tumescent
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