why does my vagina smell like weed?
omg thats a great idea
There's an old bald Japanese dude on the metra next to me. He's drinking MGD on a crowded train, and rocking out way too hard to what may be the same Dallas Green song I'm listening to. Life is sweet.
I saw Winona at my church today. She has boobs, now.
Miracles do happen.
I found her sitting in the shower having an argument with the dolphins on the shower curtain.
Some one left their pants in the elevator.
At one point, the guy you were fucking high-fived with the guy I was fucking. We should hang out with them again?
I never want to hear the words unlimited shots for boobs in the same sentence ever again.
I dont care if your mom convinced you it should be an abstinent christmas. I did horribly on finals and i'm out of booze, so you will get over her and FUCK. ME. NOW.
He won't sleep with me again until I commit...
Run. There is other dick in the sea, less clingy dick.
Well I went on a freakin rampage and destroyed a fan and claimed that it wasn't doing its fan duties... Then I knocked on everybody's doors in the hall and asked if they were content with their fan's performance and if not I would take care of it...
I just can't even fathom the crazy and I work at a mental hospital.
We were hunting our best friend with a BB gun in the backyard. I'd say the vaporizer was a worthy investment at this point.
I have to shave my legs first. I'm afraid tiny woodland creatures will fly out if he tries touches them.
I don't know bro. If a girl makes you cum hard enough that you pull a back muscle, she might be the perfect one to call for a massage on said muscle.
I just wanna fuck your brother. Sorry if thats a crime.
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