i just drank a strangers drink off a toilet
I'm starting to blur the boundary between reasonable senioritis and self-destruction. Somewhat-openly hittin the flask in 11am class
I only get commercials for vodka and Rogaine now. You're exactly right, Hulu. That's exactly right.
Standing in my kitchen eating choc chip cookie batter from the bowl. As sad as it is, I kinda like the places bad breakups take me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He turned me into a screamer. Guess I'm really not a lesbian.
I promised myself in the hospital that I would give up drinking for however long the cast stayed on. Thank god it was only soft tissue and not a fracture.
I mean like if I stood up my head might pull me down like an anchor
Never thought going to McDonald's alone at 3 AM would end with a blowjob outside some random girl's apartment...
Side note: I just realized that I can make my hand warmers double as a heated push up bra.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I threw up in my backpack last night, but at least it wasn't in the pizza box again
I am naked, and drinking straight gin with a flat tonic chaser. I had such greater hopes for myself as a child.
yea...tonic water is fucking gross.
we didn't have sex though. because i have the will power of an ox.
i just want to cuddle, make out and maybe have a boob grabbed but no. someone has to have mono.
That was the first time i’ve been physically intimidated by a LinkedIn profile.
If you think I'm going to drive 5.5 hours just to bang a guy, you'd be absolutely right.
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