Can we have unprotected sex soon?
Don't quote me on that, I'm a walking boner
i just spit dirty mouth water on my dentist. and apparently grinning sheepishly and saying "my b" doesn't make it better
Now that I've come to graduate college. I realized the only discernible skill I learned was how to roll a joint properly. go me.
Well thats $24,000 well spent.
me and this guy in my office just exchanged an "i saw you at a drag show last night" look as he passed by my desk.
his fiance had made him a calendar of pictures of her. he asked if he should take it down and i said no. i wanted her to watch.
Smoking bowl and applying to community college. I now know how I got here.
Ok, honestly? Periods can't be THAT bad, have you ever tried to shave a ball sack?!
marshmallow pipe was a success. so was melon pipe. come try it
Half of my brain feels like I donated it to science and they basically just poured jack Daniels on it and put out cigarettes into it before returning it to my skull
Just let me take your liver out and beat it with a meat tenderizer for you..
We really shouldn't need this many nicknames for the women you've had sex with.
I woke up on a different floor than I went to sleep on. Can't find my shoes.
He put on star wars porn, i thought it was hilarious last night but now i'm wondering why he has star wars porn
I was looking at your nipple and it made me think of you
Well I hope so...
I'm having to shit out rocks
Randomize
