all i know is that they all tuched my pee cup last night.
he was drinking wine. Puking into an empty water bottle. And eating french toast. ....All at the same time.
Hey if there is a better reason to go drink then "I've been fucking robbed!" I have yet to hear one. Also, I've been fucking robbed.
Please root for the ravens. I now have oral sex riding on this and it's been sooooo long
I ate shit on a rock, and when I got up this car full of people asked me if I was okay, and I just sprinted away screaming "I am a banana!"
do you remember in the middle of fleeing from the cops you stopped in the middle of the road to make out with quail man?
i know you're upset so i should probs be supportive but i've got nothing in that department. your life suuuuucks
Either sorry for fondling you Saturday or thank you for letting me fondle you Saturday.
You chugged 6 beers in a row and then outed your boss at a party last night.
He tried to do the do on me last night and my exact words were "stay away from my princess parts. they're renovating."
my bed is a shrine, and I am its goddess.
bitch dont make me pour hotsauce in your vagina
Pretty sure I was naked for most of the night.....success
the bucket list is making me question my morals...and sexuality
Sadly my Summer of Cocks is coming to an end
Randomize
