found a dugout with weed in it in dad's car. decided to top up the weed compartment with salvia. for fun.
Woke up. Made a pizza. Burnt it. Going back to bed cuz today sucks
Experimentation with dessert toppings followed by shower sex. Only logical progression bro.
All inclusive resorts are actually just places that livers go to die.
that bad?
u-n-l-i-m-i-t-e-d. f-r-e-e. t-e-q-u-i-l-a.
ripping the fire alarm off the wall probably seemed like a better idea last night than it really was.
Excuse me while I download incredibly disturbing porn until I'm more ashamed of myself than of my country.
I can't stop drooling did you spike my drink?
He should just accept that I want his dick and his friendship. Can't he understand that I don't do emotions?
Pretty sure the guy I hooked up with Saturday gave me a buy one get one free coupon for chipotle. Who said nice guys don't exist?
EXCEPT MY COUSIN SAW MY SEX TAPE!
Oh Jesus our whore days are numbered
THERES A FUCKBOY IN MY PERSONAL SPACE
GET IT AWAY FROM ME IM ALLERGIC
I think I've had more sex in your bed than you have and I've only been here three days
THERE IS A MOTHERFUCKING HUMMINGBIRD FLYING AROUND IN OUR HOUSE RIGHT NOW HOW DO I GET IT OUT????
I visited the library for the first time in my college career tonight and I got laid. I think I'm gonna come back...
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