If my vag had twitter, what do you think it would say?
I feel like i'm in "To Catch a Predator - The Musical"
If i die in the snow, get to my laptop and delete all of the nickelback. password is "barry"
as in "white"?
I think his glow in the dark Star Wars sheets, at the time, really turned me on.
So at what point while he was throwing up on the girl next to him did you think "yeah, im going to hit that"
And we hooked up in the carwash. I told you our creative juices were flowing today.
Do any of you want to be on a three way call with me while this girl masturbates in 10 min? You can't talk
I kinda remember trying to staple rolls of toilet paper to make a pillow, but it's blank after that.
koolaid chicken. i marinated it for 2 hours and roasted it on a rock in a fire. it was bright blue and raw. but that shit was tasty
I have a question: does pizza dipped in chili sound good or am I just really high?
I'm just pissed at the whore who takes over my body when I'm blacked out.
he congratulated me on my ability to grow long hair after pulling it to see if i had extensions
I'm having an emotional breakdown watching baby sloths on YouTube you need to come save me from myself.
The only reason I have clothes in my overnight bag is to cover up my sex toys.
My Mormon mother just found a butt-plug in our AirBnB closet.
Randomize
