Classy? Dude, she fucked 3 guys as part of a scavenger hunt
And?
So I thought I was doing pretty good and then I sneezed and prematurely ejaculated...
I remember asking you "need some dick tonite?"
Yeah I guess to me frat party equals penis party. oh the wonders of vodka.
I would really like to get high with Bill Nye. I'm being dead serious. Every step I take is literally a step I take because it will take me closer to Science Guy high.
We could get him to build Inspector Gadget.
I didn't know you were high TOOOO!!!
There's people holding up abortion signs everywhere. I guess the people of Florida want you to remember you fucked up on Spring Break.
All I heard was "You have collect call from Lafayette Parish Jail for Dude it was awesome! I'll tell you about it later!"
If she doesnt understand your inherent need to teabag an emo chick, do you really want to be with her?
I just asked the dr if it was herpes while wearing my shirt from the strip club...
I told you to stay away from the strippers in Oklahoma
Also there's a home game tomorrow and I thought about holding up a sign that says, "I madeout with #64 during orientation week" would that be inappropriate??
You drink too much. You cuss too much. You have questionable morals. You're everything I've ever wanted in a friend.
Pooping with Eye of the Tiger playing. Not a single fuck shall be given.
I'm a fuck boy trapped in a single mom's body.
twas supposed to be night one of rebound break but it was night one of get sloppy drunk and dance half naked in an ice shack
What happened?
Vodka. Vodka happened.
Do you remember trying to eat the shower curtain last night...?
Randomize
