As of tonight I have officially had sex during every Disney movie.
im pretty sure thats the first step to being a pedafile
We lived together for a year and neither of us knew we were both gay.
I just had to give myself a pep talk to stop lying on my floor. Literally too hung over to function
It's like salsa. But with balls in it. I like to call it balsa
Dude she gave you head while I was in the closet, we've passed the "awkward" phase.
Cant wait to drunkenly tell by kids that i banged their aunt katie in a weird threesome
I don't really want to have sex with him, I'd just want him in a threesome. Does that make sense?
That sad moment when even your drug dealer lands a summer internship and you don't...
Whenever I'm not in the mood and don't want to go to bed swampy, I just strategically suck him off during the second period intermission of the Cup playoffs and he leaves me alone and does the dishes. It's a win-win.
Well you ended up trying to convince two Greek girls that you were Greek, but failed massively by shouting at them in Spanish, and then almost vomiting after taking way too much snuff. Maybe lay off the guinness next time?
When he was going down on me I referred to him as "Lord Snow" and HE GOT IT. HE GOT THE GAME OF THRONES REFERENCE. I AM IN LOVE
I needed to bring way more fireball to class to match this professors intensity
I've never said "lesbians" so many times in a short response answer
As he put it in he shouted "geronimo!"
Wow... So was the sex good?
Yeah but it doesn't matter. My vagina is not a pool.
i said cake fell into my bra, you stood up and yelled "Im coming soldier", leaped acrossed the couch and started motorboating my boobs. i would have been cool with it if your mom didnt keep calling me the "lesbiainizer"
Randomize
