i just told a girl i would suck the alcohol out of a deoderant stick
The line was so long at Kum n Go some guy opened & drank 2 beers from his 12 pack while waiting.
I feel like I should limit myself to one meal prepared from a box per day
You were rubbing your foot on one of your legs and kept saying, "My sock feels like a waterslide!"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i have no feeling in my penis or fingers but i think it was worth it
We talked him into tasing himself.
If you get me so fucked up I can't use the microwave , I'm going to be so mad at you
i think i traded my wallet for a tim hortons gift card.
I'm taking tokes in the bath tub, come if you want, I'm naked and you have to bring chicken nuggets or else you can't come in
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
ok NEVER tell the strippers its your birthday. i think i have to burn these clothes and take a bath in bleach
The only thing I know is that these arent my shoes and Aaron is missing and he has my house keys.
Then he kissed my hand sensually and said "you're a Black Queen. Don't let anyone tell you different."
Not really how I planned to achieve immortality, but I'll take it.
I'm so happy we share a mutual love of laughing at religion.
I can’t tell if I have feelings for him or if my vagina does.
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