Have you ever noticed that nowhere is the same thing as now here, i get my best ideas when i smoke
I found out that they tried to reenact the Snooki drop by using a jump rope and the banister. Pictures say it all.
I answered the door to some Jehovah Witnesses hungover and wearing nothing but a white tshirt. I think they made it the church goal to reform me, we've gotten four pamphlets. My mom's going to make me convert if they keep coming.
It's not like I'm never gonna put out again. I'm a sure thing. I promise.
it was not a walk of shame, it was a ferry ride of shame, and i'm not ashamed, so technically it was just an early morning ferry ride. wearing yesterday's clothing
and semen
Alright fuck it. Alcoholic Jamie is back and here to stay.
After you tried speaking to him in whale you asked if you could see his "blow hole." That's how bad it was.
Wake up. We're going shopping for booze and samurai swords.
We also had rum, but now that's all gone. Which I feel is appropriate for a pirate party.
You can't call dibs on the bed... every time you party you KO in the bathtub
My entire news feed is ice bucket challenges. I wish there was a hide from feed button like FarmVille
I just fell in love with a beard, the guy it's attached to isn't great but I think I'm going to take one for the team
Dude, I'm not going to use a butt plug.
And he put my hair in my clip while i blew him...and he did a good job
I couldn't be more proud to be a cougar. Just wondering how these twenty somethings learned how to fuck so well? Must be porn.
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