I wanna come home
And do what?
Kiss. Rip clothes off. Repeat.
All I seem to do lately is get myself off, take naked pictures and drink beer. I don't know if thats a good or bad thing.
if socks could get pregnant i would have catholic amounts of kids
We started making out, then he decided to get naked, put on a condom, and proceed to dry hump my leg, sweat pants and all, until he blew his load. I thought this was college. I immediatly left claiming I can't sleep in other people's rooms. He didn't even bother taking off my hoodie.
Playing drinking games to Nancy Grace totally counts as "keeping up with current events.."
This guy just brought his piggy bank into the bar with him. Talk about corruption of childhood.
I don't have the urge to be a home-wrecker with these two. I think I've grown, don't you?
I heard from anne today. She has a broken collarbone and is knocked up. Apparently florida is awesome
I feel like this has turned into my work. But if I get paid sitting under a desk, that's perfectly fine with me.
She's in the bathroom. Literally just told me she could make a guy cum using just her words. Not bad for Sunday brunch.
no strings attached, like you could fuck him and then throw him off a building right after
I noticed while having sex on Friday that I have great endurance. CrossFit works.
I know her cup size but not her name....
The police officer that arrested me Friday night just bought me a shot
you have 10 seconds to explain why the toilet is full of bread or its ALL GOING ON YOUR BED.
Randomize
