Ur dog is a babe magnet. Reminds me of me
if i get killed by an online date, its your job to tell my parents that we met at church
My dad just passed me a joint.. this is a turning point in my life.
I'm hoping to finish this bottle of wine before I pass out, I don't want the remainder spilling on my white down comforter.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Remember the time we were in the hospital and I wanted to steel the arm restraints and use them as sex toys?? Oh college memories....
i feel like im paying for every hangover i didnt experience last year as a freshman. thank you sophomore year.
If you wake up soonish don't worry. I took your dog to burger king and now we're going to see some nice girls.
Instead of sending me a picture of his dick, he sent me a drawing of it on drawsomething. This game is getting out of control.
In conversation she brought up that she slept with Tucker Max on the UF football field
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We're listening to space jam. This can only be a good omen.
I felt so bad but my urge to be with you & drunkenly eat your face was apparently much stronger.
You tried to steal my pants at 3am saying they were yours and somebody was gonna die, not cool dude
Bill says he deeply regrets the incident with the soda bottle
Oh god...Did I just fuck a sugar granddaddy?!
Quit being awkward towards me every time the group is together. They're going to figure out we're fucking.
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