College reaches a new low. We just carved a shot glass out of a potatoe.
I've been emailing with a woman. I don't think she's into me, but we've become sorta email buddies. I'm hoping to meet her because on her profile she states she's into 'fisting.' Frankly the thought kinda freaks me out but I'm dying to see what kind of woman is 1) into that and 2) admits it upfront.
i took my goldfish out of his bowl last night and put him in my bed
well if I unknowingly shoved my hand up someones ass, I'm glad it was yours
andd if someone unknowingly shoved their hand up my ass without me knowing, im glad it was you
she made out with a stripper. how was scrabble night with your girlfriend
She asked me to head butt her and after half a bottle of whiskey that seemed reasonable.
I'm so eating pot-chocolate cookies while preggers. This kid will be so amazing.
Dude imagine how many pictures of dicks Obama gets. That can't be unusual. Almost every kids in the US has written the president a letter.
I see your walk of shame and raise you a day in jail wearing a girls old workout clothes.
I am debating about my sub. I am not quite sure I can be the dom he needs.
I warned you. Don't come crying to me when your vagina refuses to forgive you for this.
Im eating leftover Easter ham in a bubble bath. What has my life come to?
Serious question, on a scale of go for it to what the fuck are you thinking, what's me going to a monk or any religious official and saying "baptize me daddy" in a serious voice?
I think I was just motorboated by a 4-year old girl.
So... he's my second cousin's step-bro... To do or not to do?
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