I'm fascinated by her cleavage. She has deep cleavage, but no obvious boobage to speak of. Check it out.
Note to self: never go down on a girl first thing in the morning…its like opening a grilled cheese sandwich
An eyelash just fell out into my container of rice. Searching for it, i took a single piece of rice out at a time coming to the coclusion that i should not be this high while eating rice.
One of my friends found 6 bags of gummy bears on the roof. He lives a building over. Apparently even hammered you still have quite an arm
I need to stop drinking. Side note- we have a party bus tonight. So the drinking will have to end after that
You do realize I got a panda tattooed on my ass just to get you laid, right?
when you wake up try not to move. we are betting to see if more sprinkles stuck to you or the pong table.
I'm trying not to drink. I may fall down if I move. This is bad. I had everclear before the bar. Oh no. Oh no. Breathe. Breathe. Breathe.
then you said,"Take this damn cabbage!" although it was actually your shirt. i found you in the elevator of his building.
I feel like he better crank it up to level RG IV tomorrow. It's the fucking playoffs.
i got up, ate a McDouble, then went straight back to bed.
You sure know how to make a day worth living.
Why is there a horse in the backyard?
I stayed at my gfs last night. This is all on you.
let me just take this time to thank you again for buying pudding.
She blew me while I watched the jets game and the hardest thing was deciding what to focus on more
Just woke up to the cat unconscious on my stomach, his face between my tits, purring to bring down the walls. I'm endeared and horrified at the same time.
Randomize
