Its where this guy sticks a jar up his ass. Be prepared to be suspended between vomiting and cheering.
i just know my balls have never hurt this bad before
And it was confirmed to me that I did in fact cut my girlfriend out of her dress with my sword.
He doesn't need to speak English. He needs to speak sex.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just woke up to three voicemails from you. In the first one you just straight laughed for 3 minutes. In the second you did bird calls. In the third you were hysterically crying. Have fun last night?
Please stop leaving drunk voicemails with your new black/Irish accent.
She just had to change the song on the radio cause I was tap dancing on her windshield
My dad got me a charm braclet....his way of trying to support my gayness....
Hey.. Here's a thought for the evening. There's only two more sleeps until I fuck you so hard my back teeth will convulse.. Here's too Tuesday! Woohooooo
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
she's traveling up the coast with her camera and a stash of pot cookies eating food from different campuses. said she slept in a closet 2 states away last nite... of course I'm interested
Im pretty sure my housekeeper high fived her on the way out this morning
I was just asked by a police officer to not come back to Lancaster...
He said he "doesnt care at all, really" if I shave my legs or not. Challenge accepted.
STOP BUYING ALADDIN PANTS WITH MY AMAZON CREDIT CARD
A reminder in my phone just went off saying, "Fuck.On.Roof- the Great Bambino". This makes me excited and slightly nervous.
Randomize