I don't understand why she insists on me walking her to the door. She came over for literally 8 minutes, we had sex, and now I need her to leave. That fake chivalry will change nothing about the situation.
she then came into the room and yelled I'M GOING TO BE A COCK BLOCK for 5 minutes
just went trash diving in my work clothes for weed. A&E's intervention here i come.
i hope not, i just know that at one point I was sitting on the bathroom floor eating bugles and crying because i had no one to show that it looked like I had witch nails when i stuck them on the ends of all ofmy fingers.
APPARENTLY giving your friend one of your shoes so that you avoid the no shoes no service rule makes you drunk...
I'll just get wasted and start throwing myself at men. Someone's bound to take the bait
they call him Oral-B. enough said
if you fuck our toilet off the wall again, i'm going to be so mad.
Hahaha she was way into you and you kept arguing about burritos. It was amazing.
Oh my god I found my bf's erotica
OH MY GOD HE WROTE THIS EROTICA.
OH MY GOD THIS IS GOOD EROTICA.
I'm gonna try and get through this weekend sober, which is gonna be tough especially since I've already started drinking.
Nothing like a dick pic from your fave ex to make you audibly exhale sadly.
Nice classy night out before we roll our faces off
I just hooked up with the German exchange student who doesn't speak English. And you said I have no talent.
gave up morals for lent, so far it's actually been really easy.
Randomize
