dude, im still at the bar with two chics... one has a moustache ill save that one for you... be home in 20min..
sometimes i really wish you were a nugget.
I ate a lot of your sunchips. I mean a lot. Like 4 to 5 bags.
Soooo my gf got the droid and doesn't have BBM anymore, I think its over for her
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I've never had a woman show me her venereal disease results in a bar before.
As soon as he told me I had a 'pretty laugh' I knew I'd be putting out more than I had originally planned.
You had me at "you have a nicer rack then her"
He told me I just kept sending him the word sex and dollar signs.
I don't know ur idea of a good first date but I'm pretty sure it shouldn't include him holding my hair while I puke in the street
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Someone just got kicked out of the mall for being dressed like a giant cat. I feel like this is in your future.
bad night - i tried for naughty librarian but could only manage to pull off pissed off barrista.
He made me twerk for scrambled eggs... I regret nothing
Got a minor my first day of college from the bike police. I'm gonna like it here
I was less embarrassed asking him to torrent the teen mom's porn. I'm not gonna ask him to about season 4 of PLL.
He just said Bill Nye is just a dude. If I ever considered sleeping with him, I never will now.
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