Wow my backseat really seemed a lot bigger when we were 16
i'm glad we're now at the level of friendship where we can comfortably discuss the quality of our shit
In your defense, I really thought capturing that alligator would have been a lot more awesome and a lot less tragic.
RIP Mr Bojangles.
Btw. Made out with a random kid at a frat. It's all good though. He invited us to his frat party tomorrow so yay! For having plans!
I think i morst likely have 95 %patulas for hands and probably i also went to eGypt with so manyfriends. We laids in the sarcaphoguses.
You sound pretty unsure about all of this.
the only thing you and i have in common is the we like weed and looking at my naked body.
First time on E and Chris took me to a petsmart during puppy day. I might die of pure awesomeness.
I was blowing him while he was singing Happy Birthday to his girlfriend on the phone. I win.
Last I saw, they went for a smoke and only one came back. He passed out outside. I'm glad he's only 120lbs. I left him on the rug still. My mom is gonna be pissed.
A big toe in my vag is not foreplay.
I was so high I watched a 5 minute video of different scenes of horses running. The music was magical.
Alcohol won't break your heart. I mean, unless it's all gone maybe
I'll give you a blowjob in a Santa hat if it will put you in the Christmas spirit
Once again, marijuana saves me from going to jail
Fast is cars. Home is I now. Drunk yoda me is.
Randomize
