i am pregamming alone in my car. scale of 1-10 how alcoholic is that
im pretty sure thats an 11
I walked downstairs and there were 50 sorority girls. I wasn't expecting an audience during my walk of shame.
I have the Lakers game on, but all I can think about is having sex with you. Not sure what you've done here.
I feel like I should I write an apology note to the frat for falling down stairs, passing out on the couch, and chugging the entire bottle of burnetts at semiforml last weekend. Apparently I was the main topic of discussion at their chapter meeting last night.
he literally had a slideshow of all the girls hes had sex with pictures set to american woman
i feel this will be the best possible way to start a friendship. By breaking into his house.
He wants to buy me a drink to apologize for sending me a pic of his dick. Welcome to my life.
You're the reason I lose Never Have I Ever
I feel violated by Miley Cirrus's performance in the VMA's.
We had sex on a dog bed..
It was a mess. I sat on the kitchen floor with maple whiskey and cried into a bowl of poutine. I've never even been to canada
The bouncer said the club was at capacity we couldnt get in till ppl left all three of them pulled their tits out we got complimentary bottle service never under estimate women
All I know is I woke up in the back seat of my car, with the engine on, and my gps navigated to florida.
First aid class means get dry humped by moderately attractive college students during heimlich maneuver training.
I remember is someone saying "I smell weed" and then having a room full of sober high school kids look at me.
Randomize
