You took my girl thats shot the Fuck out. You better watch your skinny ass.
That's barely a sentence. Who's your girl? I think you've got the wrong number. I haven't even lived in Alabama for 4 years.
Yeah, I do, I'm sorry. I meant 205 not 256. sorry about that.
Good luck with your revenge in Birmingham.
Say something about gay babies.
Women are like Alzheimers patiens. You can compliment them a million times in a day, but the next day is always a wash, you have to start all over.
she told me she was pregnant in a never have i ever game
Stop making excuses. You can be here in 5 and cumming in 10
whatever. i don't care. i just want to be drunk wrapped in an american flag.
also, the amount of semen in my carpet right now is unforgivable...
The hookup that almost was... Both partys too drunk to migrate to the other.... the universe has won this one.
I just want to get drunk and wake up on Wednesday
It must suffice lest there secretly exist a picture of me walking out of the ocean at midnight naked and half mast with a sea urchin on my ass
I lost the back to your old name tag last night in a girls shirt. It got me a view of some titties though, I guess in some way you're still doing your brotherly deeds
Is it bad that I'm a 32 year old woman that is so afraid of commitment that a hamster is too much responsibility?
I AM NOT LOSING TO SOME FICTIONAL CROSSDRESSER
I'm texting you know although you won't get this until you wake up. the only reason you are strapped to your bed is because you were trying to fly out your window.
I made a bucket list last night. Number 5: Will marry a wizard.
Randomize
