Operation extremely regretful is in full effect
I don't think brook has ever known best
upper decked the toilet at the restaurant that wouldn't let me pee there yesterday
Omg. In the pub, there's a guy shouting at the olympic channel 'yeah! Kill that motherfucker!' we're watching figure skating.
We've been friends for six months, when do my benefits kick in?
Omg he's telling my parents stories about him doing jaagerbombs ... Lord help me
For someone only wearing socks and a cast, I felt reallyy overdressed
Yeah you insisted everyone watch Space Jam at 2 in the morning then you cried the whole way through it. You were the very worst kind of drunk.
He sent me a picture of his dick earlier so now we can all laugh at him tomorrow
I've never had goosebumps on my dick before. It was definitely not a bad feeling.
He just took a bite of each taco bell burrito and hid them throughout my apartment. this was 2 weeks ago and have found 30 burritos so far
We should totally stay in at new years, have sex and try to time orgasm to the countdown
I need to align my fucking chakras
I farted in the parking garage and it echoed.
Now I am free. And I want to go meet men. My phone deleted all my contacts, and I consider this to be a new beginning. With a new man in my phone book.
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