spencer pratt says his family invinted chess
that kid is like the al gore of hollywood.
I bet the first cavemant to make fire got so much pussy
Mines from giving head on hardwood floors.
How do you get mayonnaise out of... well jesus it's everywhere, let's start with carpets
Kegstand on crutches, you need to get on my level.
Well, I had a dudes gf walk in on us the next morning but nothing during...She shook my hand after I got dressed and said "nice to meet you with your clothes on" best moment of my life.
If the Cards come back I will fly to St Louis and shit in a very public place.
you stuck pieces of bread to your face with peanut butter and asked if it looked like you had a facial yeast infection.
ohhhh that's why they asked me to leave...
I kinda took a step back after our "surprise bottles night"
So is it safe to say that my only objective from last night is to finish this entire jar of peanut butter?
Apparently I'm a "fire hazard"
I think it's time to give up this life and become vikings. You in?
Definitely ended up doing Coke with Chewbacca in the porta potty behind the haunted house.
i woke up to a text from someone I put in my phone last night as "Giant Penis"
what did G.P. say?
oddly enough it was a dick pic
Oh god theyre drunkenly throwing knifes now, definitely the best movie I've worked on
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