i just saw a woman using her birth control packet as a wallet.
there r dinosaurs outside my house i hear them
pretty sure those are just snow plows....go back to bed
He made sure to throw up on the Mexico side of the border while we were in line at the check point. Then finished by screaming you an have it back. You can have it all back.
i dont understand why you dont get why i love him. i opened the bathroom door and he had his penis in his right hand and a mcdouble in his left.
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He gave me his number and said the usual call whenever you need someone but then was like... or just call me.
You would pick up a guy in AA.
I cleared a drunken path to my bed for you. If you hit clothes you've gone too far.
Did a bunch of gravity bongs and am watched hours of Frozen Planet. There is nothing in the world I want more than to hug a polar bear.
That's like the cock version of a mortal kombat fatality.
I like that our conversation ended with "im gonna go get pregnant goodnight"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
What am I even going to do with 20 more jello shots? And don't say give them to the cat
So what other shows do you masturbate to? Or is it just friends
I'm pretty sure I went in the girls bathroom and vomited everywhere then looked for a urinal for like 20 minutes
Update: I spent 10 minutes trying to fish out a rogue vagina weight.
Are you going to regret this?
No I do t think so
Ok then he can enter the holy dorm temple.
you poured beer in your mouth so you could be a beer pong cup for her to drink out of/make out with
Did it work?
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