Did you fuck her?
If by "fuck her" you mean "threw up on her shoes," then yes, I achieved that.
We were so bored at work tonight that we were in dry storage taking turns pouring the boxed wine we use for cooking into each others' mouths. I think I'm starting to understand the "problem" aspect of "drinking problem."
...I woke up with a yo yo in my underwear...
Whatever. I'm saving myself for my wedding night or a night with enough patron.
Please tell me nicole sent the picture of the ejaculating penis to you too, otherwise I'll feel really awkward
Woaahhhh there! We are JUST drunk fucking. Don't call me "baby".
as you might have guessed from my lack of texts, the herpes have calmed down.
The next time you try to involve a tickle me Elmo in my orgasm, I'm leaving you
my memory may be fuzzy, but the 20+ naked pictures I sent him were surprising clear
you made cordon bleu at 4am and declared you were Marshall Stewart
We have a great relationship based on communication, sex, and mutual loathing.
Well I've consulted some psychics but they keep saying all they hear in my head is screaming and all they see in my future is pool noodles and cheese dip?
Please don't finger me like a jackhammer. I'm a woman not a construction site.
Someone had to wrestle her in the chocolate pool, I'm glad I was man enough to step up and do it
I feel like i'm being yelled at when you type in all caps.Did you just have bad sex?
Randomize
