This row in front of you is like duck, duck, goose - but eating disorder, eating disorder, failed eating disorder
Shaq going to Cleveland; Vince Carter to the Magic; Michael Jackson, Farrah Fawcett, and Ed McMahon die.... ARMAGEDDON IS UPON US!!!!!
He went so fast i didnt even have time to pretend like i was about to have a fake orgasim
eating raw peppers to burn the taste of semen out of my mouth
I'm going to come in a little later this morning....there's no heterosexual way to say this....$1 flip flop sale at old navy
Every time a song comes on I get sad if glee has not a cover of it
You drank everything last night. It was like this huge deconstructed long island that went on for 5 hours
Hillary is trying to make pickle pops with vodka and sell them to kids at the ball park.
And I had on a penis ring on the whole time at dinner. And I ate veal...
He passed away peacefully doing what he loved to do best. Eating a pound of vodka gummy worms and failing at sex and the city trivia.
He noticed my new Lipstick so later tonight it's going to be on his dick.
He told me he loved me...but added "you crazy bitch" at the end. Does it still count???
Just so you know, it is really hard to rehydrate when everything is spiked with everclear.
Let's just say I peed the bed last night, and I wasn't in it alone. Whoooops
I’m planning a Pharmasutra for the first night after the pandemic ends
Pharmasutra?
Me + Chris + cocktails + viagra = night of orgasms
Randomize
