She's a black belt cougar in the 6th degree.
I hate u. Im listening to lady gaga and all i can hear is boca base om om om ommmm
I wasn't trying to make you feel bad, I just agreed with you that your life does suck.
Her dress is practically falling off. It must know I'm here.
29 “I’m Getting Old” Moments
Watching Fresh Prince at 9am with a beer in hand and he just said to Uncle Phil "Sometimes I worry that I'll never get my life together." I feel like that was a sign from above or something
i have a wrist watched drawn on my wrist that it says shot o clock
I think it got a little awkward for her when my dad walked in on us and did nothing except leave half of his pizza on the table for us.
Apparently unused tampons can also double as things to bite down on during public sex to prevent screaming...
It's like the bermuda triangle of cat puke
19 Worst Song Lyrics of All Time
Drunk in burger king. Having it our way. Free fries. M&m sundaes.
Is it really road head if took place on kayaks in the river?
I thought adderall would sober me up, but it did NOT.
If I could run through a field of Reece's and Oreos, dive off a milkfall into a bowl of cereal. My Life would complete.
I know you've been in hospital with meningitis, but last night I walked into a streetlight and bruised my penis so who's really suffering here
I was masturbating and a roofer walked past my bedroom window.