how was that guy you hooked up with?
i used to think blowing a .05 was a good thing
If God's watching us, we might as well be entertaining
nothing this campus sells is worth it. not even sex.
His dick looked like E.T.'s finger. It scared me.
He said he forgot to take his shoes off, and that he was a bad boy because he was walking on the carpet. Then he sang. Then he shouted "I'M STILL FORGETTING."
allie, at least he made an effort and braided his goatee.
Did I change midway through last night?
Seven times. The most notable outfits were UFC Fighter and Top Hat Viking
Omg do you remember last night you kept pointing to your vag asking who wants to play this like a fiddle hahaha
Breakfast Clubbing as Juggalos. I can feel our IQs in freefall.
I just discovered I can sober up while teaching class
I guess she fell asleep at the strip club and the other one was crying because she had a vagina in her face. Happy 21st!
I love the barter system - he got laid and I got him to bring me some ibuprofen. A win-win really.
Riding your boyfriend's dick for an hour then waitressing for 8 hours. Would not recommend.
Well we can add this to the list of 'where the hell did that bruise come from?'
The Game of Thrones convention was just a drunk fuckfest.
Please tell me you banged Jon Snow.
Randomize
