Ok let me ask a question, does aderall make women less apt to have sex?
Cause it just destroys penises
Was that inappropriate? I can't gauge these things anymore
We got bored. So we went to planned parenthood to stare at everyone who made worse decisions than us last night.
Life Lesson Number 76: Masturbating into a sock is useless if there is a hole in it.
Oh god. There is a bite mark in the bar of soap. Please tell me I was not that wasted.
Ps I don't think it counts as being open minded if you didn't know he was missing a leg until you had already started making out.
Jumped in the kebab van and said he was Ultimate MasterChef. Incurred wrath of six angry Turks. I got free chips.
He likes bondage and spanking and shit.
Oh, so "normal" kinky not "I wanna pee on people" kinky. I can handle that.
There's a bachlorette party going on at the bowling alley, so we'll see who wins greatest shitshow tonight.
i fucking swear, saying shit like "i dont get jealous" is like personally inviting your slutty friend to fuck the guy you slept with like a month ago
But how will the next generation learn about life choices without a Jersery Shore?
Woke up with a text saying "when I get to see them titties again lil ma??" With 8 beads around my neck & an empty bottle of vodka in my arms.
So what's the moral standing on reading gay porn on your phone whilst sitting next to your 87 year old Grandma?
Now theyre filling the kiddie pool water with boxes and boxes of jello powder and im not sure if thats a sign i should leave or what
Idk man there's lots of bad dick but even a bad cookie is still pretty good
He has no idea I'm scrolling through Instagram while he's going down on me. I'm so bored.
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