so i know my style isnt the best ever but u should have told me i was wearing two different shoes
Forget about socially acceptable. Make me happy instead
never have i ever had a craving for dick this badly
its not that she doesnt like having sex with you, your balls just smell worst then your ass.
I kno. She bruised her chin trying to swim thru the hardwood floor.
So fucked up. Can't tell if I'm starving or about to puke. Playing it safe and eating froot loops. Tasty in, colorful out.
Pitchers of shots should be outlawed. I've puked more than i've breathed in the past half hour.
I just yelled at my mom for getting me circumcised without my permission. That drunk
I put tequila in my salad dressing yesterday. Step the fuck up.
I'm getting a collar when he gets back in to town! That's like the bdsm equivalent of getting his class ring!
I just got a free round of shots. Don't you DARE fuckin tell me that A-cup boobs can't get you good things.
The difference in our lives is summed up perfectly in that you woke up next to a 6'4" guy with an accent and I woke up next to an unwrapped piece of string cheese.
Quick question, did I crash teeth with you when I snogged you, or did I headbutt something between the car and the bed last night?
I woke up completely naked in a mint condition 71 chevelle in someones garage. What.
There are 6 of us in a mini cooper and his maid is in the trunk...she needed a ride.
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