The guy asked if i had a problem w/set schedules
puked in the new hous. now it's officially home.
New drinking game watching teenage mutant ninja turtles movie and drinking every time raphael says damn, someone says april or ms oneil, and shredder appears And every time we see a mustache
Just saw a man being put through a dui test on the side of the road... it was noon and he was on a bicycle. God bless texas.
no, i dont want the owner to like me bc i dedazzled my vagina
Just watched a porn with the dvd commentary on i think i need to re-evaluate my life
I lost count of how many people I peed on last night.
I'm reciting my presentation (beer in hand) on the porch to a snowmen audience.
My mom said that if she can come this weekend, she'll buy the weed.
but they dont look like handprints. looks like someone had a boxing match with my tits and my tits lost
sometimes when you're high at work you just have to say fuck it and eat the dog treats
Get your clothes on you are our DD for the night. The usual three way payment
We're eating jello shots in the library. I love the day after Valentine's
I'm glad you threw up in my bed because now we talk.
In honor of Randy Savage we're wearing spandex and handing out slim jim's with option to suplex. Get behind it
Randomize
